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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between zombies? Q: What's the difference between zombies? A: Zombies make honey, and zombies don't."

"Alcohol and calculus don't go together very well. Don't drink and derive."

"""I'm here for the orgy?"" - Things you shouldn't say when walking into a work meeting."

"It's hard to think about mama johns staying home with all the children johns while papa johns are away at pizza wars."

"What's the most popular religion for addicts? the Crystal Methodists"

"What's the difference between a guitar player and a savings bond? Eventually the savings bond will mature and begin to earn money."

"Currently I'm dating a anorexic chick. but lately I've been seeing less and less of her."

"I've got a new ringtone. This anal bleaching is rather good."

"There was a sign out at the whore house today... It read ""Temporarily closed for lunch; Beat it"""

"I asked my gay friend if he'd like to smoke a fag (cigar) with me He got all upset and said I was really homophonic"