207009

Joke of the Day

"How many mystery writers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two: one to get it 95% done, and the second to give it the twist at the end."

"With a margin of error of plus or minus three percent. That's how I poll."

"What's the name of the phobia for a fear of opening your mailbox because there might be a wedding invitation inside?"

"What's the policy at French morgues? Baguette and tag it."

"If there was a game show where people have to find a phone charger before their phone dies I would win the million dollars"

"Reddit, tell me the most offensive joke you know. [NSFW]"

"Why did Billy not care who he offended while posting on the internet? Because the ends justify the memes"

"Balloon's What's a balloon's favorite genre of music? Pop."

"What's long and hard and full of semen? A submarine."

"""Mom I got a 36!"" ""On the ACT?"" ""No, the SAT!"""