201028

Joke of the Day

"Why don't more dinosaurs join the police force? They can't hide behind billboards."

"The inventor of puppets must have been really fucking lonely."

"What's the difference between a thief and a pervert? A thief ~~steals~~ snatches your watch, a pervert watches your snatch. EDIT: I've done fucked it up."

"i just found a web site where you can see women with no clothes on not even underwear! brb!"

"Wife: How many women have u slept with? Husband: Only you, Honey. With everyone else, I was awake."

"Why was the gunman on a diet? Because he was still at large."

"So I ordered a pizza I ordered a funghi pizza yesterday but I was pretty disappointed.. They obviously have mushroom for improvement"

"First year my husband didn't give me some sort of sweet on our anniversary. I got roses. He thinks I'm fat. I know it."

"M-I can't go. My Ewok is sick. H-Gigi that's a stuffed animal. M- H- M-Crap. I think you're right. I bet he ate all my Doritos again."

"I apologize for those affected, but at the same time I couldn't resist. I may have sinned. Who are the fastest readers in the world? 9/11 victims; 110 stories in less than 10 seconds."