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Joke of the Day

"My parents told me as a kid that R&B stood for ribbons and bows so when I heard Barry White in their bedroom I left them alone to do crafts."

"I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 10. I hope it's thinking about me too."

"What's Sauron's favorite soft drink? Mountain Dewm"

"I hate people who have a great timing with jokes. When I do it I get responses like ""Who are you and why are you at my grandma's funeral?"""

"What's the difference between an Afghan Military Base and a Pakistani School? I don't know, I just fly the drone."

"As I pulled back the ring-pull on my 5th can of beer, I heard ""Hello."" I thought to myself, ""It must be the drink talking."""

"A man fixes a lightbulb, crosses the street, and walks into a bar. He tells the bartender: ""My whole life is a joke."""

"Did you hear the one about the umbrella in the trench coat and sunglasses? He was looking shady."

"I met my wife in an African Languages class We just clicked"

"What did the physics professor shout when he disproved Hooke's Law in early to mid March? Spring break!"