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Joke of the Day
"I'm thinking of a number between 1 and 10. I hope it's thinking about me too."
Next Joke
"What do you call a guy with no arms, no legs, and sits in a pile of leaves? Russell."
"Drunk guy is pissing in the park An Old lady walked past him and says with anger: - What a beast! - Don't worry Ma'am I'm holding him"
"SURPRISE! I scream, bursting from the vat of mashed potatoes. The other lunch ladies do not look surprised They do not look surprised at all"
"Me: why do bad things happen to good people? God: *reveals image of me jerking off to April from Ninja Turtles* Me: oh God: *nods solemnly*"
"What happened to the Greek dairy farmer who got robbed on his way to market? He was un-feta-ed of his cheese."
"I like my women like i like my steak. Raw"
"When the police asked Bernie if he profited from stealing millions of dollars from his former clients he replied, ""What do you think i'm Madoff?"""
"Wow, some people are so prepared! Christmas is 364 days away, and some people already have their lights up!"
"Sorry I interrupted your wedding dance with a much much better dance"