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Joke of the Day
"I'm not worried about the Third World War. That's the Third World's Problem."
Next Joke
"It might take more muscles to frown than to smile, but it takes even less to completely avoid eye contact in the first place."
"A very drunk man walks into a bar He yells: two large beers and a packet of crisps please! Lady: sir, this is a library. Man, whispering: two large beers and a packet of crisps please!"
"What's the favourite flavour of sharks? Shark-o-late!"
"Giant methane storms on Uranus Ex-post from r/science"
"Only use ""extra virgin"" to describe olive oil that doesn't even think about fucking."
"Why do women watch porn movies from start to finish ? They think there will be a wedding at the end."
"Its funny how guys always say they would give their left nut to do something awesome. Why is the right nut so much cooler than the left nut?"
"I watched my dog chase his tail in circles for ten minutes. It amazed me how stupid and easily entertained he was. Then I realized I had just watched my dog chase his tail for ten minutes."
"Overheated some milk in a lab experiment today... ...and asked the teacher if it would affect the result. Her response? ""To a degree."""