190667
Joke of the Day
"""BE YOURSELF!"" is about the worst advice you can give to some people."
Next Joke
"Since Michael Jackson's death hundreds of children have gathered at the gates of Neverland. Police have said that they will let them out once they find a locksmith. - http://ww.key-n-lock.com"
"When I'm away from my girlfriend, I feel incomplete... ... But I love it when we're together again, because she makes me feel hole."
"Did you hear about the guy they found dead at the Mediterranean restaurant? Yeah, police are calling it a hummus-cide."
"Gabe Newell! Gabe Newell lived from 1962 until Half-Life 3, confirmed!"
"Maybe your parents told you a watched pot never boils so you wouldn't go around sticking your face near boiling water, idiot."
"Contrary to the rest of America, Twitter runs on drunken."
"How did the sloth become President of the tree? He slept his way to the top."
"French guy (showing me his yachts): This is Un. This is Deux. This is Trois. This is Quatre. This is Six. Me: Where's the 5th? FG: Cinq."
"Han: Leave us alone, you fat slug! Jabba: *speaks Huttese* C-3PO: The mighty Jabbs says your words are hurtful. He has a thyroid problem."