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Joke of the Day

"My friend says he needs to get hydrated immediately. Well, water you waiting for?!"

"I like my men like I like my farts. Wet and old."

"If you read stressed backward it's desserts...coincidence? :)"

"4 people were about to have sex I think they were in foursome fun"

"What is the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, ""Spit out your gum,"" but a train says, ""Chew chew!"""

"Good friends are like bottles of sweet wine .. that's why I keep mine locked in the cellar."

"What grows on the World Wide Web and stings? Internettles."

"Where do you find a quadriplegic? Where you last left him."

"HOBBIES INCLUDE: - Whispering dark secrets to animals - Trying to get a strawberry seed out of my teeth - Being vegan, but also eating steak"

"Why are women terrible drivers? Because making sandwiches behind the wheel is a lot harder than making them in the kitchen."