184128
Joke of the Day
"Relax. You are not paranoid. People really do hate you."
Next Joke
"Dog: [Barks at the mailman] Human: Bad dog. Dog: [Turns to the camera] My human hates bills, yet gets mad when I try to scare the guy off."
"""Your storage is full"" thanks Apple, I'll just go and delete some photos of friends and family, but at least I'll always have the stocks app"
"My teacher told me that two words should never have the same sound. What a homophonic bigot!"
"Did you know some dogs don't pass the Police Academy? ...they didn't pass the pawlygraph test."
"Just got a fancy new bathroom scale that tells you what percentage pizza you are."
"The #1 Killer of cats aged 14+ is feline AIDS. However, the #1 Killer of people aged 60+ is.... Hearing AIDS."
"Why didn't the art thief get away? Because he didn't have to Monet to pay the Guy to make the Van Gogh."
"My boyfriend is like an iPhone 7 Just jacks off"
"Took a screenshot with my iPhone with the intention of texting a picture of my cracked screen.So the answer is no I didn't graduate college."