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Joke of the Day

"Conan refuses to accept a 12:05 Tonight Show. NBC says he can't leave. I'm just waiting for Obama to say Leno is a ""jackass""."

"I approached a photographer and took his picture. He had me arrested.."

"So I just heard there is a disease killing off the Alligator population in Florida. They all got Gatorades."

"What's the difference between a kitten and your wife? You actually want to cuddle a kitten after you fuck it."

"Why men shop at Costco? Because it's a hoe sale."

"The early bird needs to shut the fcuk up."

"What did the dog say after a hard day at work ? ""Today sure was ruff"" Read that today on my university's art wall and made me smile a bit , thought i'd share it :P"

"Genie: what is your first wish? Joe: I want to be rich Genie: Granted. And what is your second wish? Rich: I want lots of money"

"PEDIATRICIAN: This could sting a little. KID: Okay. PEDIATRICIAN: One day the sun will envelope the earth and we will all turn to dust."

"The thing about ice skating ... No matter how good you are, the hardest part is always your nipples."