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Joke of the Day

"What's worse than getting 7 years of bad luck from breaking a mirror? Getting a lifetime of bad luck from breaking a condom."

"What US city has the dirtiest frozen waffles? San Diego"

"Donated blood today. One lucky person will wake up from an operation with the sudden ability to read 3000 tweets per hour."

"Two Flies Two flies were sitting on a turd. One of the flies farts. The other fly looks at him and says, ""Hey! Do you mind? I'm trying to eat here."""

"I was arrested for stealing shoes... I just wanted to pay less at Payless!"

"A man gifted his wife a diamond necklace for their anniversary and then his wife didn't speak to him for 6 months. It was part of the deal"

"How do you get off a non-stop flight?"

"What's the affirmative response to a Jamaican mother? Yeah mom!"

"A politician set out to create the most jobs Crime creates lots of jobs - police, insurance, repairs, medical if its violent crime, lawyers... and so was born the criminal nature of politicians."

"The sushi at my local deli is to die of."