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Joke of the Day
"What is a ghost's favorite street? A boooooooolevard."
Next Joke
"Dude it's 2014 if your kids aren't sending nudes left and right and cross platform then you gotta worry about their technological literacy."
"DAE always have that substitute teacher who didn't know anything about the subject matter? Sorry. Wrong sub."
"What's the difference between a chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I've never paid to have a garbanzo bean on my chest"
"What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't bother, he's not coming."
"ME: did it hurt GIRL AT BAR: did wat hurt ME: when ur hopes of having a nice uninterupted night out got crushed bc i started talking to u"
"Buddha: all life is suffering Me: alright dude, chill out. they said your food would be out in ten minutes"
"*me looking at a police lineup* Number 3 is cute. OMG Is he single? Give him my number! What? Oh. Right. Five. Number 5 killed my grandpa."
"My wife is an angel. Bob and Harry are fishing one day.... Bob.... ""How's your wife been?"" Harry....""She's an angel, how about yours?"" Bob....""Egh, mine is still alive."""
"In the case of emergencies, why are women and children evacuated first? So that men can think for a solution in silence."