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Joke of the Day

"I don't understand why death row inmates are given their choice of meal before they're executed. ""I have to die tomorrow, but I get TACOS!"""

"Why did the condom fly across the room? It got pissed off."

"Did you hear about the dyslexic, agnostic insomniac? He stayed awake all night wondering if there really is a dog."

"Alan Rickman is dead sorry all the other subreddits were taken"

"What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom? A pickpocket snatches watches... Courtesy of the late Redd Foxx."

"Why did the demon get arrested? Posession"

"I asked my Sushi Chef what his favorite roll was. . he said payroll."

"Reportedly Wayne Rooney said to Roy Hodgson ""I don't know if I'm better on the left, middle or right"" Hodgson responded ""Shut up and pick a seat on the plane Wayne"""

"Public restrooms are weird. The guy in the stall next to me has four feet and is wearing heels on one pair."

"Why did Luke Skywalker and Princess Leia never get together? Because Luke was looking for love in Alderaan places!!"