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Joke of the Day

"GF just thought of the best name for a drink. The Vadge Liqueur. (Should I be concerned? This was totally random)"

"You know what's a load of crap? Anal sex"

"And in the news today, Justin Bieber has yet to be shot in a drive by. . ."

"The FAA has shut down airspace over Ferguson, which must be to stop the problem of people rioting and looting in the sky. #FergusonDecision"

"What's the square root of sixty-nine? Eight-something!"

"What do you with 365 used rubbers? Turn it into a tire and call it a goodyear."

"Did you hear about the kindergartener with a bad knee? He needed a kid knee transplant."

"When a farmer fucks a sheep, do you know why he does so at the edge of a cliff? So the sheep will push back."

"*Farmer walks into job application Farmer: I barely speak English, and my village doesn't have a computer. Employer: BOOM! Tech support!"

"I haven't slept for ten days... ... Because that would be too long."