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Joke of the Day

"Give man a jacket and he'll be warm when he goes outside. Teach a man to jack it and he'll never go outside again."

"Choose your own adventure: S O F A T H E R E Y E S P O P Dad sees a soda? Moving a couch for dad? Obese girl with a vision problem?"

"Vagina Steak (nswf) Today my husband asked me if my vagina was ""medium well"" yet? Pink but not bloody."

"Sometimes you just have to grab the bull by the balls before you realize ""This can't be right."""

"Having gay parents must be horrible You either get twice the usual amount of dad jokes or get stuck in an infinite loop of ""go ask your mom"""

"Did you hear about the Scarecrow that won an award? It was for being outstanding in his field."

"Scientists have reached the conclusion that the owl has the most acute sense of hearing They clearly haven't experimented on men browsing porn while their wives are asleep."

"Saw a bumper sticker that said 'Jesus is the answer.' Two cars later I saw one that said 'Who farted?' Best game of Highway Jeopardy ever."

"A scientific joke Q: Why are Curium, Helium, and Barium the medical elements? A: Because if you can't Curium or Helium them, you Barium!"

"I call my mom santa.... Cause she is always calling me a ho ho ho"