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Joke of the Day
"What kind of car did Jesus drive? a manual."
Next Joke
"I'm like a mouse. If u give a mouse a cookie hes gonna want some milk. If u gimme a beer im gonna want some nachos. Plus we both like cheese"
"Nurse pops her head into the doctor's office..... Nurse: 'Doctor, there's an invisible man in the waiting room.' Doctor: 'Tell him I can't see him.'"
"*Buys map of world, pins up on wall *Throws dart, swears to visit wherever it lands *hits wall outlet *has amazing time being electrocuted"
"Everyone working at a bank looks like if you said ""Marry me and I'll take you away from all this,"" they'd instantly scream ""Yes!"""
"Keep your eyes wide open before marriage, half shut afterwards."
"There are two types of people, those who can extrapolate from incomplete data"
"We've replaced the names of the foreign countries & leaders in Trump's speech with the names of IKEA furniture. Let's see if he notices"
"I went to the shop to buy eight legs of venison... But it was two deer."
"What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? Same time next month? (sorry if repost)"