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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between HP computers and HP in a video game? One of them you want to see a lot less of."

"What do you call a baby Mexican? A paragraph because he's not quite an essay (ese)"

"How do rocks feel about moss? It's growing on them."

"Had sex with a condom tonight. Maybe next time it will be with a girl."

"Why did the Mexican train driver kill all of his passengers? I'm not sure, but he must have had a loco motive. edit: grammar"

"its shanksgiving, be thankful i havent stabbed u yet."

"Why do Americans write ""color"" instead of ""colour""? Because fuck ""u"", that's why."

"Q: What did the blonde think of the new computer? A: She didn't like it because she couldn't get channel 9."

"I just want to have the poker face of a toddler that tells you that they didn't poop their pants."

"[at the opera] Me: what's wrong with that guy Wife: shh! Me: but he's tiny, he can barely hold that violin Wife [whispers]: that's a cello"