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Joke of the Day
"Why do Americans write ""color"" instead of ""colour""? Because fuck ""u"", that's why."
Next Joke
"What do you call a prostitute with her hands down her pants? Self-employed"
"I just killed a man and his death is everywhere! (Ate a piece of toast and made some crumbs, dramatized for your entertainment *bow*)"
"Help, my anus is trying to kill me!"
"difference between erotic and kinky Erotic is is rubbing a feather all over your lover; Kinky is using the chicken."
"An alarm clock that texts your boss for you the fifth time you press snooze"
"They say that 5 in 3 people are bad at fractions. Don't even get me started on the other half."
"I heard there's a machine that can make cocaine in less than 4 milliseconds! I believe it's called the Instagram."
"[Captain America, minutes after the love of his life's funeral] Damn her niece is hot"
"You know what they say about cliffhangers..."