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Joke of the Day

"A neutron walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender gives it to him and he slams in down in one gulp. ""What do I owe ya?"" asks the neutron. ""For you? No charge."""

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"What do you call a musical sheep group? An Alcapelca... yeah that was bad.. sorry world.."
"HUSBAND: When I get mad at you, you never fight back.How do you control your anger? WIFE : I clean the toilet.... HUSBAND:How does that help ? WIFE : I use your toothbrush."
"What does a bi-sexual porn star do at work? Fuck all"
"What goes Vrrrooom-schreech, Vrrrooom-schreech, Vrrrooom-schreech? A blonde at a flashing red light."
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Bark ! Bark who ? Bark you car on the drive !"
"Why does the French Military install rearview mirrors on their tanks? So that they can see the battle."
"I heard that the majority of car accidents happen within 15 minutes of home So I decided to move 30 minutes away"
"A woman walks up to the bar and asks the bartender for a double entendre. So the bartender gave it to her"
"What do you call a one legged woman? Eileen"