171015

Joke of the Day

"Wanna hear a dirty joke? A white horse fell in the mud."

"Why did Rosemary get kicked out of the spice rack? For swallowing Poppy's Seed"

"I leave notes around the house to remind me of things I need to do, like ""Pick up milk"" or ""Pay gas bill"" or ""Stop wasting your life away"""

"This termite walks into a bar... And says ""Where's the bar tender?"

"[Arkham Asylum] GUARD 1: that guy's CRAZY *gestures to Joker's cell* JOKER: *using Bing instead of Google* GUARD 2: *whispers* holy shit"

"What's the difference between a Taliban outpost and a Pakistani elementary school? I don't know, I only fly the drone"

"What do baby parabola drink? Their Quadratic Formula!"

"The tree and the wind. What does a tree say after it gets knocked over by the wind? I went out on a limb."

"Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2 is getting released for the second time in Iraq. They're renaming the game to The Sims 5."

"I hate when people talk behind my back. They disscuss me."