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Joke of the Day

"A man sitting in a publisher's office has his memoir turned down for a third time... He sighed and said ""story of my life."""

"Why was the milkman afraid on Christmas eve? The ghost of Christmas Pasteurisation."

"Where does a burger feel at home? On the range!"

"Science Jokes Thread on AskReddit! For your amusement: http://en.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/1auxsf/what_are_some_funny_scientific_jokes_that_you_know/"

"Why hasn't Joe entered the race yet? He's just Biden his time."

"The son to his dad * Son - Dad at last i lost my virginity- * Dad -OH! so good son, i am proud of you, come on, sit here and tell me- * Son -I don't think i could sit for a while"

"What do you call the sweat between two rednecks having sex? Relative humidity!"

"What's 3 inches long and pleases all women? A credit card."

"Did you hear about the Mathematician who was constipated, and lost his calculator? He worked it out with a pencil"

"I signed up to volunteer at a pro-life bake sale I'll be selling cups of uncooked batter and insisting they're actually cupcakes"