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Joke of the Day

"Co-worker: You drink a lot of coffee!!!! Me: It's for your own safety."

"What's the worst part about dating a Japanese girl? When you break up with her, you have to drop the bomb twice before she gets it."

"What do you call a prisoner who's psychic,has dwarfism and escaped the prison? A small medium at large!"

"OMG. I saw Leonardo da Vinci trending and thought he died."

"Did you hear about the gay magician? He disappeared with a poof."

"I punched a drug addict in the face. I guess I beat the crack outta him. (The best joke I have ever made up.)"

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Adeline ! Adeline who ? Adeline extra to the letter !"

"Canadians leaving south for vacation are like Americans escaping marriage, desperately trying to escape frigid temperatures..."

"Q: Why do they say 'Amen' at the end of a prayer instead of 'Awomen'? A: The same reason they sing Hymns instead of Hers!"

"In an alternate universe cats feed humans Lean Cuisines while muttering ""I don't know how you eat that shit""."