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Joke of the Day

"The longest 10 seconds of my day is when I have to hold down the button on an electronic thing to turn it off"

"My LASIK doctor said that if I get 2000 upvotes on this post I'll get free treatment. Upvote for visibility."

"here is a self depreciating joke. **Q: What is the difference between me and a brick?** A: Bricks get laid"

"So the power went out during the Superbowl (Texans Joke) Better get J.J Watt!"

"What does a brick and your mom have in common? They are both flat-chested and laid by Mexicans. Source: My old middle school."

"""Hi can I just have a single burger?"" I'm sorry, all of our burgers are in a relationship ""But that's not eve- Please show some respect"

"What do you call a Reddit Psychic? A 4chan teller"

"How is Trump different from Hitler? Unlike Hitler Trump wants to round up every Juan. Edit : No offence to Trump supporters or anyone!"

"What do you call a turtle that sends pictures to everyone? a Snapping Turtle"

"me: SHOW ME WHERE IT SAYS `NO CATS ALLOWED' thats not a cat its a king cobra & it just went into the ballpit me: Bitey loves kids doe"