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Joke of the Day

"A jewish girl asks her dad for 40 dollars her dad looks at her and says""30 DOLLARS??!!?!, what do you need 20 dollars for? here's a ten, go split it with your brother"""

"Ebay You have got to love Ebay Sold my homing pigeons 4 times this month."

"Dodged the bullet A girl asked me today if she is wearing too much make-up. I told her my reply depends on whether or not she intends to kill Batman."

"What happens if Mike Tyson carries around Mjolnir all day? He gets thor arms!"

"I had an omelette with FIVE different types of mushroom this morning. It truly was a Breakfast of Champignons."

"Love that show where they lure loan officers into a house with mending, To Patch a Creditor."

"Why wasn't the droid hungry? Because BB8"

"You can tell a lot about a woman by the way she organizes body parts in her freezer"

"While shopping, look for this marker on where the gluten free aisle is at. You'll see a man with a gun to his mouth. Because, you know, bullets are gluten free."

"Can America keep it down? Canada needs to work on Monday."