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Joke of the Day

"I had an omelette with FIVE different types of mushroom this morning. It truly was a Breakfast of Champignons."

"What do you call a witch that stays out all night? A fresh air freak."

"I've learnt a lot from the movies over the years, such as how to count using Roman numerals... I, II, III, IV, V, Balboa."

"People stuck in an elevator called for help. They were let down."

"What did the barber say to the Potato? ""You've got eyes on the back of your head!"""

"Q: What's the best place to photograph Clinton Administration officials? A: A police lineup."

"At least my parents April fools joke wasn't a child. /u/ChodeologyPHD came up with this."

"You know what really grinds my gears? I'll see myself out"

"My wife turns over and accidentally kicks me in the nuts. I gasp. She gasps. Then she raises her arms and yells, ""I WIN! I WIN!"""

"I have a great joke Newcastle United"