151906

Joke of the Day

"Two fat Scottish sounding women in my bar tonight... ""Hey, are you two from Scotland?"" I asked. ""It's WALES you fucking idiot,"" one yelled. I apologized, ""Sorry, are you two whales from Scotland?"""

"What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick"

"Yep, we're the minority around here when we have the only Wi-Fi network name written in English in the entire neighborhood."

"On a scale of 1-10 How old was Michael Jackson's boyfriend?"

"I recently attempted the world record for masturbation. I nearly pulled it off"

"Condoms. I can't wrap my head around them."

"I bet a lot of people have tried that ""See you next year!"" joke at the end of December but got proven wrong by dying in a DUI."

"You say you don't eat a lot of fast food but it kinda looks a little like you do."

"In Soviet Russia, Russia Soviet."

"A Muslim walks into the U.S Just kidding"