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Joke of the Day
"I recently attempted the world record for masturbation. I nearly pulled it off"
Next Joke
"My girlfriend treats me like God She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something."
"How is a lesbian like a camel? Their hump has no bone."
"I never make New Year's resolutions. I just carry the ones over from the previous year and add ""This time I'm serious"""
"Have you ever accidentally ended a business call with ""I love you?"" Oh yeah me neither."
"Two wrongs don't make a right. And two half-wits don't make a wit."
"Why did the Christmas tree get thrown in prison? Treeson."
"Why are people pissed off that Justin Bieber smoked some weed? It's not like he released another album or anything."
"What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot you racist"
"Facebookers reacting to it snowing is very similar to a caveman reacting to seeing fire for the first time."