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Joke of the Day

"There's a fine line between a mirror and the end of this rolled up dollar bill."

"Global Wobbling now causes constipation http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=2whgsnc&s=8#.VCJrcPldWQg"

"I get really sad whenever I go to Florida It just seems to be a tropical depression"

"1) In the interest of time, would ye noble patriots please provide a list of infractions punishable by spontaneous public execution? Thanks!"

"When I die I'm going to donate my body to science. That's the only way I'll ever get into medical school."

"It's such a beautiful day I had to open the window while I watched TV."

"My girlfriend asked me why I was sitting with the eggs... I couldn't find my whisk, and if you can't beat them, you might as well join them..."

"Why does the hobo only drink coffee? Because he has no proper tea! Hehehhehahahahhhehveahhs"

"The invention of the shovel It was truly groundbreaking"

"A man was walking on a nude beach... A man with a foot long dick was walking on a nude beach when he was arrested by the police. The charge? Weapons of Lass Destruction"