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Joke of the Day

"A man was walking on a nude beach... A man with a foot long dick was walking on a nude beach when he was arrested by the police. The charge? Weapons of Lass Destruction"

"What did the tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches."

"So my boyfriend and I broke up, but I made a Sim family about us.. I just realized I have to kill every member of that family"

"Heard the one about the wealthy lesbian prostitute? She makes money hand over fist"

"How much money did the bronco have? Only a buck!"

"My last gf was so Mexican... that I needed a glass of milk to toss her salad."

"I haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months I don't like to interrupt her."

"Knock knock! Who's there? Police. Police who? Police open the door -- I forgot my lunch!"

"Why are iPhones' batteries not called apple juice Because they don't have enough juice in them ^Explanation: ^circlejerk ^on ^iPhone's ^battery ^running ^out ^fast don't kill me pls, i love apple ^yay"

"Got a HJ (""handjob"") from a FRUIT! [NSFW if you can't have handjob jokes @ W] He gave apple and made me kumquats!"