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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a 100 year old ant ? An antique !"

"""Your name is Duck?"" It's Doug. ""Yeah. Duck"" Doug. ""Duck?"" DouGGG ""Got it. Duck"" Go fuGG yourself ""Haha. Classic Duck"""

"Anytime you see a young man open a car door for his girlfriend either the car is new or the girlfriend is."

"Chuck Norris eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow."

"PILOT: Welcome to flying school. Any questions? ME: Is it possible to crash into a rainbow? PILOT: Yes it's how most of you will die. Next?"

"What does a woman and KFC have in common? Well, you start with the breasts and the thighs, and you end up with a greasy box to put your bone in."

"Broke my good sunglasses... But instead of buying new ones, I'm just gonna put Trump pictures where the lenses used to be. He seems to be far more polarizing than my Costas ever were."

"Beernuts and Deernuts What's the difference between Beernuts and Deernuts? Beernuts are $8.95 and Deernuts are under a buck!"

"Why did the vampire enjoy ballroom dancing? He could really get into the vaultz."

"COP: Did the suspect have a birthmark? MARK: He's alive so I'm assuming he had a birth, yes."