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Joke of the Day

"If your mother-in-law and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose... would you go to lunch or a movie?"

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"Why is the Canadian Mint so confusing? Because they don't make any cents."
"Pickup Lines Everyone says you're an Angel, but I think you're Medusa because whenever I stare into your eyes I turn rock hard. Do you like bad grades cause I can give you all the D's"
"Some cool ways to trick a woman into bed include ""being kind,"" ""making her feel special"" & ""showing her respect."" They love that shit!"
"I had a dream that I was fighting Jason Bourne, Will Hunting and Tom Ripley Thanks to months of therapy, I'm finally battling my Damons."
"How do you get over a fear of elevators? Just take some steps to avoid them!"
"A child gets a toy Ferrari stuck in his belly button... ... it wouldn't be a problem if it was an Audi."
"What even is Atheism? A non-prophet organization."
"Why would the jewish cannibal eat you? For-Skin"
"What's the difference between a dead hooker and a Ferrari? I didn't lose my virginity to a Ferrari."