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Joke of the Day

"I get all my cardio from sex.... That's why I'm so fat."

"The value of money in a relationship: the 10 bucks that the wife and the tax inspection don't know about are worth more than the 100 that both know about."

"What's do call a masrbating cow? Beef stroganoff..."

"And on the sixth day, God created man first so that he could enjoy a few minutes on Earth without saying the wrong thing to a woman."

"My bf asked me to act like a ""naughty school girl"" for him so I forged a note from my mom saying I don't have to participate."

"The sun is a star. So technically it's night all the time."

"[slowly rises from trashcan while 2 friends are making plans without me] i am also free that day."

"the difference between me and humpty dumpty is that his friends looked at him and thought to themselves ""we should put him back together"""

"Me: Let's have a fight with that guy you like Brain: That's not a good idea, he might actually like y... Me: GOOD IDEA! WE ATTACK AT DAWN!"

"If you need space join NASA' Baby! XD"