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Joke of the Day

"Plagiarism is bad? Change a few words, that shit is yours. It's like when you change a baby's clothes- new baby. New baby that's yours now."

"Duck walks into a pharmacy and asks for some lip balm. ""Certainly sir, will that be cash or credit?"" ""Just put it on my bill."""

"What's the first part of a stripper to blow? The knee. It's a load-bearing joint."

"How Does Snoop Dogg Do His Laundry? He uses a lot of BLEAYOTCH!"

"Why did the police arrest the energizer bunny? He was wanted for several charges of battery"

"75% of humans masterbate in the shower, the other 25% hum, do you know what song they hum? Well then I guess I know which percentage you're in."

"I have a step-stool because I never knew my real stool ^"

"I used to have a 2 year old son, he died the same way Eric Clapton's son died... For inspiration"

"What do you get if you cross a skunk with a bear ? Winnie the Pooh !"

"How do you get 300 babies in a bowl? Blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips"