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Joke of the Day

"I have been talking to this beautiful woman online for a while... And today I finally got to meet him"

"Why did the police arrest the sidewalk sidewalk? It always had some sort of weed on it!"

"It takes me about 25 minutes to pack a suitcase, but I still always block out 4 hours for it."

"My dick was in the Guinness book of records... Until the librarian throw me out."

"Unlimited data is better than unlimited drama, and that's why I love my phone."

"21 ways to piss off the mods on this sub [removed]"

"Hey, courtroom artists. If you think the guy sounds guilty, draw an eye patch or scar. This isn't photography."

"I have a fetish fetish. Things that turn me on turn me on."

"The other day I was almost arrested for mooning. Public indecency, my ass."

"Amazingly, over half a million people showed up for Obama's inauguration ceremony, and only 8 missed work."