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Joke of the Day

"A blue whale produces 400 gallons of sperm when he ejaculates... [NSFW] And you wonder why the sea tastes so salty..."

":# <--- emoticon for ""I'm eating a brillo pad"""

"Why did the vegetable band break up? They couldn't keep a beet."

"News to me: When they wash your hair after a haircut, it's considered rude to say ""your breasts smell like a ham sandwich""."

"Adulthood is like the vet, and we're all the dogs that were excited for the car ride until we realized where we're going."

"If Robbie Rotten's ""We are number one"" is a meme.. Does that make one a musical number?"

"A man gets pulled over... the officer asks the man ""Are you drunk right now?"" The man behind the wheel says ""I swear to drunk I'm not god"""

"Hey Science, ""mission accomplished"" on the boner pills. How about a laptop battery that will stay up for four hours."

"Scared of eating genetically modified fruit? Grow a pear."

"So, to re-cap... ...I put the top back on my pen."