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Joke of the Day
"So, to re-cap... ...I put the top back on my pen."
Next Joke
"*Spends 30 min practicing Starbucks order in mirror* *Feels confident* *""Hi I'd like a grander ahoy Ralph Macchioatto lateenbay""* *dammit*"
"Looking up at his wife, he asked, ""Honey, Do I have trouble making up my own mind?"""
"What did the great Ape say as he plummeted from the skyscraper? Listen baby I think I'm falling for you!"
"What would you do? geaNostra"
"Frankenstein: Help I've got a short circuit! Igor: Don't worry I'll lengthen it."
"If Pokemon had a national holiday, what would it be called? Ash Wednesday"
"I started running back and forth repeatedly... ...and now my head hertz."
"I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer I'm not sure what he laced them with, but I've tripping all day."
"Dude, I can't tweet AND know when the light turns green. I'm pretty, not magical."