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Joke of the Day

"A man gets pulled over... the officer asks the man ""Are you drunk right now?"" The man behind the wheel says ""I swear to drunk I'm not god"""

"Chuck Norris can clear 5 lines at once in tetris."

"Truthful Tuesday: Sometimes I just say ""Hello"" back because there are too many witnesses around to stab you repeatedly in the face."

"Do you think Lincoln was good at pleasuring the ladies? If he was, did they call him the pounding father?"

"Some people are like Slinkys... Totally useless, but still fun to push down the stairs."

"I'm thinking of starting a youth foundation... I mean I've already got like 30 kids buried in my basement."

"My mate Gav overdosed on heart burn tablets I cant believe Gav is gone."

"Why did so many blacks die in Vietnam? Every time somebody yelled, ""GET DOWN!"" they'd get up and dance."

"So a black guy and an asian guy walk into a classroom... The black guy gets a D- while the asian guy gets a B The asian guy gets beat up by the black guy lol"

"What is the poo from a fish with no dad called? bassturd"