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Joke of the Day

"How do you call a Mexican who lost his car? Carlos."

"When Snoop Dogg proposed He got down on bended knee, opened up a box with a ring in it and said: ""Marriage. Wanna?"""

"""Give me a positive adjective..."" ""Splendid."" ""Nice. Now how about a negative adjective?"" ""Splendidn't."""

"The early bird needs to shut the fcuk up."

"Sure I could get off the couch & put new batteries in this remote but instead I am going to hold it high above my head & at different angles"

"I had sex on a camping trip for the first time recently... It was fucking in tents."

"How did Dairy Queen get pregnant? Burger King didn't wrap his Whopper."

"'Twas the night before Christmas, and everyone knew, you were still out shopping, yes, it sucks to be you."

"The inventor of dog treats died earlier on today. He was a good boy. Yes he was."

"I wonder What happens when doctor's wife eats an apple a day?"