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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear what happened when the Pope went to mount Olive? Popeye beat the shit out of him."

"I can't play music in piano; I guess you could say it's not my forte."

"I'm done congratulating people for having babies. Parents have been getting praise for having sex incorrectly for way too long."

"What did the snail say when he jumped on the turtle's back? Wheeeeee!"

"Is my wife dissatisfied with me? A tiny part of me says yes.."

"My girlfriend just broke up with me... ...it's all cool though, she said we could still remain cousins."

"Dude is texting with a flip phone, just like George Washington did"

"Give a man a fish, sickening him with botulism which spreads rapidly, people begin dying in droves, STACKS OF CORPSES BLOT OUT THE SUN."

"I've never eaten the right amount of Indian food."

"I'VE GOT (( PROBLEMS AND A STUCK SHIFT KEY IS ONE."