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Joke of the Day

"First they came for the people who loaded the dishwasher incorrectly & I did not speak out. Because they do my head in."

"I had an idea for a hot air balloon underwear company. I couldn't get it off the ground."

"Bartender: What will you have? Me: Whiskey BT: Straight? Me: Except for that one time in college. BT: Me: BT: Me: How 'bout them Red Sox?"

"One way to find out if you're old is to fall down in front of a group of people. If they laugh, you're young, if they panic, you're old."

"What's black and yellow and goes ""Ahhhhh"" A school bus falling off a cliff."

"I know a guy who used to have Leukaemia He's Luekae to be alive."

"If you're behind someone at an ATM, let them know you're not a threat by gently kissing their neck."

"One day, I made instant coffee in my microwave. I nearly went back in time. - Steven Wright"

"First Review in for ""The Force Awakens"" Absolutely to die for"

"How do you circumcise a redneck? Kick his sister in the jaw."