117423

Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend likes to play this weird game.. Where she dresses up like herself and acts like a bitch all the time."

"What do you call the entrance to a prostitute's house? Hodor."

"Kid pulls prank on teachers seat with glue. Teacher dies due to... Asphyxiation."

"never trust a persom who speaks in absolutes"

"Kangaroo 911: What's your emergency? Kangaroo: I CAN'T FIND MY CHILDREN Kangaroo 911: Did you check your pockets? Kangaroo: Oh nevermind"

"Before my girlfriend moved in I always had one night stand Now that things are getting serious we have two night stands"

"All that Felix proved Sunday was that Red bull does not give you wings... You must use a parachute"

"Why do black people have white palms? Everyone has a little good in them."

"Excuse me, do you have a valentine's card that says ""You're the love of my life""? - Yes. - Great. Give me 10."

"A Roman soldier walks into a bar He holds up two fingers and says ""I'll have five beers please"""