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Joke of the Day

"At a live orchestra, and lightening strikes, who gets hit first? The Conductor"

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"I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high She seemed surprised"
"I saw two really fat people today talking... Looked like a heavy discussion"
"Why did the semen cross the road? I put on the wrong sock this morning"
"What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment."
"And the Oscar goes to... Jail."
"Bad day? Just remember, there are folks that have their ex's name tattooed on their body. Merica."
"What do you get when you cross Groot with Santa? A Giving Christmas Tree"
"Why did the tree have lots of fans? Because he was Poplar!"
"Do you know what smuck is? It's what smurf's do after smoreplay"