115162

Joke of the Day

"Did you hear the one about the donkey and the sloth? Ultamate frisbee badger!"

"I watched Mad Max and now I'm riding my dog around my living room using two bananas as guns"

"Of course I work out. I do burpees after drinking pop. I do lunges to grab the last slice of pizza & squats if I drop it."

"In high school I hooked up with my teacher... She was really into me... I mean I was home schooled, but still!"

"Why did the chicken not cross the road? The original joke is childish."

"What does Mortal Kombat and a church in Helsinki have in common? Finnish Hymn!"

"[Crate and Barrel job interview] ""So why do you want to work here?"" DONKEY KONG [sweating]: I love interior design"

"If I'd shot you sooner, I'd be out of jail by now."

"When I was in high school my girlfriend's dad got angry that I took her virginity. I said ""Sorry, it won't happen again."""

"What do you call a fish with three eyes? fiiish. (works when spoken :-/)"