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Joke of the Day

"What do you call the High Sparrow who is caught molesting kids? The Deviated Septon."

"LGBT should rename themselves BLTG. It's more tasteful."

"I had the left side of my body cut off... But I'm all right. EDIT: I just realize that whether the left was cut from the right or the right from the left is a matter of sincere argument."

"How can you tell ignorance from indifference? I don't know and I don't care."

"My friend David lost his ID... Now we just call him Dave."

"Why did the Fall break off from all the other seasons? Because it wanted autumnomy"

"What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long? Polaroids."

"How do you know someone went to Harvard? They tell you."

"Is there an app to delete your number out of other people's phones yet?"

"I'm an insomniac, and I fucking hate it... My friends sleep like a log and they love it, but when I try I have nightmares about lumberjacks."