108049

Joke of the Day

"What do you call a coin featuring the image of a spaceship and a rooster? Badmintin' (P.s. I'm sorry, this is terrible)"

"Me: If you don't like my rules, maybe you can find a different mom. 4yo: *excitedly* Can we really do that?"

"I've always wanted to be in a circle jerk, but nobody else was interested... So I started cloning myself, and now I've come full circle!"

"What do you get when you mix free running with golf? Parfour Sorry"

"what did the captain say when the navigator complained they were off course? don't give me that latitude"

"He died doing what he loved -- screaming for help and punching a bear."

"I'm on the powerlifting forums, trying to convince everyone that kissing another man before you bench gives you an awesome adrenaline boost."

"Why did the bear eat his mate? He called her 'honey', then got hungry."

"If you pronounce the word vase like ""voz"" I'm gonna want to punch you in the foz"

"I've got money left over for condoms or lottery tickets. I'm trying to calculate the odds."