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Joke of the Day
"I'm here for whatever you need me to do from the couch."
Next Joke
"What animal should you never play cards with? A cheetah"
"How do infomercial salesmen tell you you're fat? Butt weight! There's more!"
"Congratulations, parents! The names yelled at dog parks are now less weird than the names yelled at playgrounds."
"A Priest and a Rabbi are walking down the road.. and they see a boyscout bending over. The Priest says ""Man I'd screw that."" and the Rabbi replies ""Out of what??"""
"Why did the semen cross the road? I wore the wrong socks today :("
"What do you have when you have 1000 whites skydiving? Oil"
"What's the difference between sex and a slice of pizza? It takes me longer to eat the pizza"
"I went in to a pet shop. I said, ""Can I buy a goldfish?"" The guy said, ""Do you want an aquarium?"" I said, ""I don't care what star sign it is."""
"A man walks into the bar But fails since he was too busy drinking through law school"