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Joke of the Day

"13 Hours Why did Hilary Clinton not go watch the movie 13 hours? She already slept through it once. Edit: sleep to slept"

"A cig takes 7 minutes off your life A piece of bacon takes 9 minutes off your life According to my calculations I should have died in 1812"

"What's the difference between voicing your opinion on reddit and getting gang raped? In one at least you get some sex out of it."

"What's the difference between a viola and a trampoline? You take your shoes off before jumping on a trampoline."

"A man goes into the library and says ""Do you have that book about small penis's?"" Librarian says,"" I don't think it's in yet"". Man,"" Yes, that's the one""."

"What do you call a belt with a clock? A waist of time."

"Pokemon GO servers are like my life right now. Up and down and disappointing anyone who knows what it is."

"What's the difference between my wife and the dress? The dress is white and gold"

"I heard someone say their podcast was on ""hiatus"", guess that sounds better than ""my mom took away my laptop""."

"Our school should start a calculus club We would all derive fun from it"