103188

Joke of the Day

"13 Hours Why did Hilary Clinton not go watch the movie 13 hours? She already slept through it once. Edit: sleep to slept"

"[NSFW] What did Olive Oyl say to Popeye on their wedding night? ""No fisting."""

"Do you know how the store Menards got its name? A pirate was kicked in the nuts and he went, ""Arr! Me-nards!"""

"What is green and smells like bacon? ... Kermit's finger"

"How did Marty McFly react when shown what 2015 would really look like? Gee, it's hard to say, although he did seem pretty shaken up about it."

"(Generic title that catches your attention) (Mildly amusing pun)"

"her: tell me about yourself me: ok so u know when a dog runs too fast on tile and crashes into a wall but then looks at u like its ur fault"

"sometimes I'm really not sure which KKK is the worst, the racist one, or kim, kourtney & khloe."

"Tit for tat My old aunts would come and tease me at weddings, ""Well Shona? Do you think you'll be next?"" We settled this quickly once I started doing the same to them at funerals."

"If laughter is the best medicine, then most facebook status updates are Herpes, Gonorrhea, Hepatitis and Syphilis all rolled into one."