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Joke of the Day
"There was a woman trapped inside a Safeway, She was found dead of starvation the next morning."
Next Joke
"Tweeting and grocery shopping don't mix. I've been down every aisle and just realized all I have in my cart is a cabbage and someone's baby."
"My kids don't drive me to drink. Can't wait until they get their license and they can though."
"What's a monsters favorite play? Romeo and Ghouliet"
"My goal weight is for it not to look like I'm having a stroke when I yawn."
"What fruit worries teenagers the most? A promegranate."
"I love the way you move...like butter on a bald monkey."
"If April showers bring May flowers... then May flowers bring Pilgrims."
"The Italian faucet.... When it drips it goes wopwopwopwopwopwopwopwop."
"Did you hear? Chuck Norris moved to Endor He became an Ewok'er Texas ranger."