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Joke of the Day

"I'm not religious, but avocados are proof of a benevolent creator."

"Why do women like men with moustaches? Because they immediately see something about you they can change."

"Computers manufacturer is considering changing the command ""Press Any Key"" to ""Press Return Key"" because of the flood of calls asking where the ""Any"" key is."

"My friend just got a pool table for Christmas so he gave me a call inviting me around for a pool tournament with the boys. I said thanks for the invite but I prefer to pool by myself."

"""Ma'am, are you aware that you were going 92 in a 55? I'm gonna need you to step out of the car."" ""Um, I have a boyfriend."""

"Poor Brain... It got to named itself, but was dyslexic, so Brian it was not."

"*Prosecution points to badger*: Objection! This animal has no place in court! Defense: Your honor, the badger is prosecuting the witness"

"The USA and Ethiopia played a football friendly. The final score was USA 8, Ethiopia didn't."

"What's the difference between a Lima Bean and a Chick Pea? I never payed a hundred bucks to have a Lima Bean on my face."

"A son walks up to his dad and tells him: ""Dad, did you know in other countries you don't know who your wife is until you get married?"" His dad replies: ""It's like that everywhere son."""