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Joke of the Day

"A son walks up to his dad and tells him: ""Dad, did you know in other countries you don't know who your wife is until you get married?"" His dad replies: ""It's like that everywhere son."""

Next Joke
 
"Little girl/boy: ""Mommy, I want to be a [PERSON I DISAGREE WITH] when I grow up."" Mom: ""Well pick one sweetie, you can't do both."""
"""I'd like two scoops of ice cream, please."" ""Chocolate or vanilla?"" ""Yes."" ""Yes what?"" ""Yes, Sir, ice cream man, Sir!"""
"What do you call food between two slices of bread? a sandwich"
"Shouting, ""You're all pathetic idiots!"" to freedom of speech protesters... Soon changes their tone."
"Did you know... Did you know that Stevie Wonder has been paying child support for kids he's never seen?"
"Robin: ""Please?"" Batman: ""No."" ""It's prom!"" ""You can't drive the Batmobile!"" Alfred: ""Can I? It's Bingo night."" Batman: *tosses keys*"
"What do Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music and Keith Richards have in common? They both made habits fashionable."
"I ran my car into a pole The poor bastard never saw me coming"
"I totally understand how batteries feel because I'm rarely ever included in things either"